Hot Chocolate week is upon us! Running from November 16-22 2009, what better excuse do you need to take some time out and enjoy a gorgeous hot chocolate drink?


I had every right to be worried about going in to work last Monday – it was terrible. We barely spoke, but things soon came to a head and on Thursday there was a massive bust up involving us two plus one of our bosses.

In the end I was sent home because I was upset and had barely slept for the week so I was told to go home and rest up that afternoon and my boss would be given a talking to. Half an hour after arriving home, I was given a call by my boss asking to see me after college so we could talk. I went round (full of the beginnings of a cold) and we seemed to settle things.

Whatever she says, I’m still not going to be trusting her 100% and I think there will always be parts of me which will remain closed off from her which usually wouldn’t be. I feel that as I’m growing as a person I don’t want so much on show for her to pick at and pull apart. It’s ok for me to keep a bit of me private, isn’t it?

Anyway, I stayed off from work on Friday since my cold started coming out and I didn’t want to spread it around the office anymore than it already was. Yesterday I had a really sore throat and found swallowing and talking difficult. Today I’ve had tissues at the ready and a very sore and runny nose and I don’t think an hour can pass me by without sneezing around 20 times! My face is swollen and I currently have hamster cheeks and aching teeth.

Tomorrow is looking set to be a fun one. There’s only me in from the admin side and I’m not going to be feeling great. The good news is that the boss won’t be in all week and by the time she gets back I’ll only have 5 more work days until my next weeks annual leave!


Nervous!

08Nov09

I’m not really looking forward to going back to work tomorrow, in fact I’m rather nervous about it.

Not just because of the time I’ve had off sick or not knowing quite what I’ll have left to do on my return. But the dynamics of the office have completely changed since I had that bust up with the boss. She’s more secretive, I walk around on egg shells. I feel like I’m defying my mother and trying to break the rules, whilst she is using an iron fist to control me.

Recently, before I became ill, I was taking each day as it came and dealing with what was thrown at me. When I popped in on Thursday I felt that this wouldn’t work any more. I’ll still take it slowly but I will be more of my own person, I won’t share the secrets that I used to and I’ll keep myself to myself.

The boss doesn’t seem to like it that I’m becoming more of who I want to be, she doesn’t like it that I’m not so controllable and not someone who can be taken advantage of before. She doesn’t like it that more people talk to me, confide in me, laugh with me. She preferred it when I was left and sat in the corner hoping people wouldn’t notice me, but that’s not who I am anymore. I’m me. I’ve come out of my shell and I’ve developed a personality. At the grand old age of 26 I’ve finally found who I’m meant to be.

The office is hard to work in because of these problems. It’s difficult to go 8 hours a day without the possibility of upsetting her. It’s frustrating and I’m having to hold back on so many things.

I’m honestly thinking about looking for a new job in the new year. I’m not going to run out and grab the first thing that comes along, and I’m not going to just quit my job in the hopes that something will turn up. But I don’t know how long I can manage to work under these conditions. It’s crippling me. I know that may sound like a huge exaggeration, but it’s not. I feel so restrained and confined. I can only act a certain way because someone may get upset? How fair is this on me?

I’m not a nasty person, far from it. I hate hurting people. But yet I go to work every day and have comments said to me which are on the verge of bullying. Some nasty things have been said which with hindsight I realise weren’t called for and were below the belt, but I didn’t get upset about them at the time. There’s no need for me to be treated like this, and I shouldn’t be made to feel like this either.

Tomorrow will come, I’ll go to work and get on with the things I have to do but I’m not looking forward to it.


Giant Cupcake

07Nov09

I’m thinking that this looks rather delicious!

Sorry for the lack of posts this week, but I’ve been on leave from work and haven’t really got up to much. I still went to college and had my hands ravaged by the fibreglass tips which I took straight off again on Thursday night. One nail has been buffed so much the nail plate has almost disappeared, but I know with some care and a lot of patience it will all soon be repaired.

Yesterday I went out shopping with Mark and managed to fill up 5 hours in most of my shops. I did manage to buy the first few Christmas presents and I know a few other items I want to buy, so I’m going to check them out online as they weren’t in stock in the actual shops yesterday. Plus I might try and sneak a few things on to my Christmas list. Yep, I still make a list every year!

Back to work on Monday which is something I’m not looking forward to. I feel like a lot of things will have changed whilst I’ve been off these two weeks, so I will feel I’ve missed out on a lot and will not be let in on secrets and events, but it’s something that happens and I have to deal with. Only another three weeks and I’m off for another week again, which I’m already counting down the days to. Then there will be more college, more Christmas shopping and the possibility of a trip to the Birmingham NEC for The Clothes Show 2009, depeneding if the boss still wants to go.

So all in all I’ve not had a very eventful week. I’ve just about recovered from the flu, still get tired a bit quicker than usual but that’s to be expected, I’ve watched tv and been shopping. But I’ve enjoyed my time off and that’s the main thing.


Did you get caught up in the hype for the limited edition free scarf?

Giles Deacon teamed up with Cadbury and designed a scarf for the new Cadbury Nibbles range that has recently come out.

I was among the lucky few who managed to bag a ‘Nibbles’ scarf for free. If you don’t already know, it involved queuing on the Internet at certain sites – various pop up stores opened online throughout the day – until you were lucky enough to be asked to leave your details.

I definitely got caught up in it!


Coffee Art

28Oct09

As I’m still off and very, very bored I’ve been looking at completely random things on Youtube.

Then I found this. I think the dog is just too cute!


I’ll admit I’m a slacker.

Work has been odd and a little manic. I’ve got next week off (yay!) but I’m off today as I’m poorly. I feel like I may have the beginning of the flu, I’m aching all over and generally feeling kind of gross!

This weekend because I wasn’t feeling up to much we nipped off to look for some bits for my car. It’s been shuddering and jumping a bit and there just is no power when I put my foot down. Cue the boyfriend looking under the bonnet and realising I had a problem and electrical sparks flying around. We didn’t find the bits we needed in the end though. I got out of a warm comfy bed for no reason!

Yesterday after sleeping practically most of a the weekend I managed to stay awake to watch a film. In two halves. No one said I had to watch it all in one go!

I opted for a good old Disney film and watched Beverly Hills Chihuahua which Mark had bought for me as I kept annoying him singing along to the trailer on every other film we watched. I think I’ve finally got it out of my system now!

So now that I’m home and feeling snotty and gross and Mark is preparing to go to work. I think I’m going to go and watch Gossip Girls Season 2 and maybe some other girly goodness.