Prohibited

So, I have been tagged with a sparkly gift by the lovely Gracey and have been picked as one of her featured friends. *smiles*

I’ll keep this going and tag you:

• Becca
• SleepyJane
• Sharon
• Gena

Thank you girls, for being great blog friends and always having some lovely words to say.

Lets see if we can keep this going ladies. Go tag a few friends, inform them and send them some glittery love.

I’m having to find me a swimsuit and I have to have it by the 9th June. Yes girls, I’m going to actually do some exercise in the form of Aqua Aerobics. Yippee!

Me and 2 girls from work (the admin team) are going to start going. It sounds fun. It looks fun. It’s just the swimming cossie part that has put the fear of God in to me.

I’ve already got one swimsuit here that I’ve ordered and I still have time to return it but… eek! I look like a sack of potatoes. With fat thighs. And cellulite! Now, I’m pretty sure I don’t look that awful in my underwear but put me in a black all-in-one (and yes, it has to be an all-in-one… y’know, flabby belly and all that!) and I look like a hideous monster. Currently I’m contemplating hiding myself in a wetsuit; one cut off at the knees so all my belly fat can shoot down my legs and give me chubby knees instead. I can just imagine it now. I’m still on the look out for a decent swimming costume.

But how can I sort out this damn cellulite. One of the most annoying things about being a woman. That and having periods. *growl* I didn’t think it was too bad. Maybe it was the black colouring contrasting against my milky white skin. And the bruises. I bruise far too easily, Mark honestly hasn’t been beating me up!

Enough moaning. I’m off to use all my cellulite creams and body brush profusely.

Oh yeah, I’m back. Call that search party back in!

I haven’t had the chance to do an update since last weekend, but I can’t really think of much to say about my hugely uneventful week off.

Monday we did indeed go to a local town and see some cars. I’ve decided I really do like what I thought I did, however I didn’t want to test drive any so just peered through a few windows and daydreamed a little. I still want a new car, it’s there in the back of my mind for a bit. I’ll try and save some more money up and see what we can do in a few months time.

Tuesday we went back to Mark’s and did some food shopping on the way. Oh the fun of going around a supermarket when all the kids have just finished school. It’s not the best thing I can think of for a lazy afternoon, but you gotta get food when you’re hungry, right?

Majority of the week was spent just chilling out and forgetting about work. I realised that yes, in fact, I did need the break and I’m so glad it came when it did. Mark and I did some talking and a few things are settled. I’m feeling good about things again, not that I was grumpy about my relationship but spending a few days in each others company has put a few things right.

Saturday we popped to mine briefly so I could ditch some clothes and grab a shower before heading off to Mark’s mums. I also found out my sister had been hospitalised. She had been feeling bloated all week and had thrown up a few times on the Saturday morning, so she got called in to the doctors who referred her to the hospital who then admitted her overnight. She’s had some blood tests done and we are now awaiting the results. It looks as if it may be an ulcer, but she’s having an ultra sound scan and having a camera put down her throat. Yuck. She’s back home now though and everything is back to normal.

When we finally arrived at Mark’s mums we were greeted with a huge feast. Steaks, sausages, salad. All very yummy. And all for a birthday meal for Mark. Champagne was drunk (although it was far too dry for me - is there ever a nice fruity kind of drink I’d like?!) and everyone was feeling good.

Sunday we came back home but not until we found out that the Uncle that currently lives in Mark’s house (confusing, much?) is now in hospital. He is suffering with gallstones and kidney stones, and has been for the past 40 years. He’s recently had jaundice and is now quite ill. His consultant has said he needs an operation to remove his gallbladder and do something about the kidney stones. Apparently he is so ill they are basically just falling out and the stones are moving around internally and causing a lot of pain, or something along those lines. Nice! But another doctor turned around and said he’s far too old for it, and it would just be a waste of time. He wanted a second opinion, for which I don’t blame him. He’s now in hospital indefinitely whilst they look after him.. something to do with shivering but his body temperature is far too high, like his body can’t find a happy medium temperature wise. And whilst he’s in there he’ll be put on the waiting list for this operation. Fingers crossed he’ll get better soon.

And finally, yesterday. It was a Bank Holiday here so I went out with my family *gasp* and had a full day out shopping. I bought some clothes and I’m annoyed that the tops look great around my chest area but then just hang to my big fat ol’ tyre of a belly. Exercise will be started asap.

And it was also Mark’s 30th birthday yesterday too, but he was at home in bed and catching up on some sleep so he can do his week of night shifts which started last night. Some birthday, huh? He’s not too happy about being in his 30’s whilst I can still say I’m in my early 20’s. Aww, bless. Still he has the mind of an 18 year old so at least he’s not turned in to a grumpy git just yet!

So I’m off for the next week. Mark’s official holiday is just finishing and mine hasn’t even begun.

This weekend has been pretty good so far. Saturday we went out for lunch with my family for my dad’s birthday back in April. At the beginning of April he’d had an operation on his foot which involved placing a metal rod in his toe to straighten it out so he was unable to get out and about for his actual birthday, hence the late family meal. He still has the rod in there now but can walk about happily as if nothing has happened. The food was lovely, the company good and I was even brave enough to drive Mark, instead of the other way round!

Today after a luxurious lie in, we had lunch and Mark slept for about 2 hours in the afternoon. Then we decided to head off to the local cinema (me driving again!) to see Iron Man. It was actually a pretty decent film, considering I’m not a comic book fan or anything. I’d go see it again or even buy the dvd.

Tomorrow we are off to go look at cars again for me. Hopefully. I very much doubt I’ll find anything I like or want to buy, but at least I’m out looking and may possibly have a test drive. A very small possibility, but it’s still there!

So, a nice week off work for me and it’s not going to be relaxing and we’re not going to run out of things to do. I already know at the end of the week we are going to see Mark’s mum and spend the weekend there for yet another meal. This one to celebrate Mark’s 30th on Monday 26th. Bless him. Older but not necessarily wiser!

Y’know. Work has been hectic and I’m really tired. I’ve spent the past couple of days running around trying to cram all my work in to go help the new girl, who as lovely as she is, isn’t as quick at doing things (I want to push her out of the way and do it myself! Fast!) and she doesn’t prioritise very well.

I’m shattered.

All that is keeping me smiling is my week off next week. Yep, you heard right. I’m actually taking time out from the office in the hopes I’ll find a nice bit of sun and can relax and read. A lot. But, as always, I’m sure it will rain or snow when we are really supposed to be hitting the beginning of summer. It’s just my luck.

Not sure what I’m doing yet. I’m hoping to go look at some cars, out for a meal and spend time with Mark. We’ll probably head over to his folks too because he rarely sees them… and it’s his 30th birthday on the 26th. Oh yes, the big Three Ohhh. I’ve got him a couple of things, and I’m planning a few presents. I have ideas, it’s just finding the time to action them.

My Wii Fit came last week. I’ve played it a few times, but I’m already fed up of it telling me I’m overweight and putting on more. So far I’ve put on 2lbs and I haven’t even eaten lots and I’ve been doing exercise. Hmph. I’m not sure if it’s because I do it at different times of the day, but that’s my excuse and I’m sticking too it! It’s quite fun to play with anyway so I’m having a laugh, getting my heart pumping and feeling good.

I’m lacking for a decent entry of late, whoops.

See what the AWESOME SleepyJane sent me??

I got the package this morning, I’d been expecting it but not what I found inside. I knew I won the handmade gift competition a little while ago, but was not prepared for what I actually received.

Thank you so much!! There are so many goodies and wonderful things, and see I’ve even got make up now and I’ve been told to use it. Wheee… so many bits to try out, I’m going to go have a play with them all.

I won’t post a proper entry because I’m feeling a little down over a few issues I have. It’s nothing you all haven’t heard before, but I’ve been left reeling again after a couple of things. My self-esteem has been dented and I feel a little out of sorts. Plus, it’s not fair to make you read all about it.

I’m sure by tomorrow I’ll be back to my usual bundle of smiles and chirpiness. Not that you’d ever notice it here!

Honestly, why am I so down on myself?

For quite some time now I’ve been wanting to get a new car. My current one is fine, but I’ve had it four years and I feel like it’s time for a change.

Yesterday we went looking around some used cars in my town and although we didn’t find what I’m looking for, we got to find out what I’m likely to get for my money. Then we stumbled across a pretty good car, only a year old and very little mileage.. but it was right. It wasn’t me.

I searched around and found a couple that I’d like to see that are not very far from home. Yes, they were a little more than I could afford, but I just wanted to have a look, see the car, take it for a test drive. I’d know if I really wanted that type of car and I could find something a little cheaper. But no one wanted to know, or come with me.

It’s all been put on hold now. Mark has said he’ll come view the cars in a couple of weeks time, when we have a week booked off from work. I’m not so sure about it all now though.

What happens if I really like the car and want that one. I can’t afford it, I can’t buy it. I’ll have to wait for quite a while before I could afford it. I know my parents have offered me a loan instead of going to the bank, but it’s convincing them I can pay it back.

Yesterday was a bit of an anti-climax. I’d been told I could go look at cars and see what’s available. But as soon as I find one I’d really like to view it’s all forgotten about.

I’m trying to not let it get to me, to avoid disappointment, to stop talking about it in front of my parents. I’ll just be tempting fate and will be even more annoyed when it doesn’t happen. I just wish I could sort it all out myself, that my savings would be multiplied over night and I wouldn’t have to worry about borrowing from my parents. I know I could wait, hang on to the car I have now and save myself, but it will be years before I even get that kind of money.

I don’t know… maybe I’m just trying to run before I can walk.

I was going to write and say I’m being a grumpy little darling today, but that’s not the case anymore. Having read a couple of peoples entries I’ve calmed down from what was causing my head to explode and I don’t really know what my problem was. Making sense? Good.

Why doesn’t your own life seem interesting when you write about it? All I seem to do is eat, work and sleep and I’m fed up with writing how my day at work went. I know exactly how it went, it’s not something I need to remind myself about. I don’t need to have memories. Yet others seem to do so much more, so much you feel you are missing out on. Grr.

*sigh*

I think I’m going to go take a shower, wrap up warm (I’m freezing!) and have a little think and talk with myself. I feel like I’m heading in a downward spiral again.